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Dear Cynthia... > Long Time Depression
Long Time Depression
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1 post
Nov 21, 2009
9:38 AM
I'm grate for this website. I'm also grieving, and have been for many years over various losses. For some reason, I can't seem to let go of loss. It's hard for me to think of the past in almost in any area of my life without feeling sad. I've lost a few friends, my parents, two of my cats, and most recently, my brother this past July, whom I was very close it. I've also lost many friends over the years, not to death, but because the hard time I have in keeping friends, maybe due to my depression.

I'm single and have no children. I feel loss a great deal of the time. I tried contacting the Center for the Living for the Dying (not sure of the exact name of this organization) in San Jose, CA, which is where I live. I never heard anything back from them...

I have suffered from depression for many years. I've been on various anti-depressants for about 18 years, the most recent of which has been Lexapro, which I have been on for about 6 or 7 years. I have no medical insurance, and really want to get my medication changed. Would like to find a really good psychiatrist in the South Bay who really knows their stuff in the medication arena.

Thanks, Cindy, for this website. It's such a great idea. There are many people out there who are depressed, and if they're like me, ashamed of their depression. There's always this lurking though process underneath everything telling me that I'm depressed because I've made bad choices, am not doing enough, am not disciplined enough to battle my negative thoughts, am not spiritual enough, etc. etc.

At the very least, just to be able to admit all of this, albeit online, is at least a step in the right path...
249 posts
Nov 24, 2009
1:39 AM
Thanks for sharing your experience. Just as people with cancer can run into blame for their illness (being told they have cancer because they didn't eat right, or think positively enough, etc) people with depression can blame themselves for their suffering. This is partly because it's in the nature of depression to self-blame, but it's also in our culture to associate depression with some kind of failure. I think the most important thing we can do for depression is to try to accept ourselves where we are, and assume that if we're not doing what we think we need to feel better, that there is a good reason. Understanding that reason helps us feel the compassion for ourselves that leads to healing. I'm delighted that you found the courage to take this "step in the right path...."


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Email: CynthiaLubow@yahoo.com 

 Cynthia W. Lubow, MFT

 For 30 years, compassionately helping people build self-confidence and feel happier.

 San Francisco East Bay Area Therapist

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Including San Francisco, Berkeley, Oakland, Los Angeles, San Luis Obispo, Monterey, Santa Rosa, Sacramento, San Diego, Ukiah, Marin...