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Dear Cynthia... > Domestic Violence Resources
Domestic Violence Resources
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1 post
Dec 19, 2008
10:34 PM
Dear Cynthia,

When I was only 13 years old I started a relationship with a man who was 27 years old at the time and it all ended bad because when i turned 15 I decided to move on and he did not take it very well. He started insulting me, hurting me emotionally and physically, and telling me that if a ever left or called the police on him he would come back to hurt me and the rest of my family. Now I am 20 years old with a son and a husband and feel I like I am not sure what i want I am always affraid of him coming back and that he tries to hurt my loved ones. I feel like I have no motivation because I am always thinking of when that day comes and know I even have dreams about him coming back after me what should I do? I know he was in jell for like three years or so, but I also know that he is out, but I don't know were. All of the frustation of thinking of has had me down emotionally for five years and I am not sure if the love of my son and husband are going to be enough to keep me going. What sould I do, I know I need help, but I don;t know were to get if from.
1 post
Apr 23, 2009
1:15 PM
I can really relate to this person situation.I was in a DV relationship for two years, and he pretty much did the same thing and did carry out he treat by assaulted me really bad, and knocking four of my teeth out my mouth .That was eight years ago. I still have nightmares,triggers, and flashbacks. I did'nt leave my house for years. I been in therapy for five years it has help, but I still do not feel safe. I'm tired of feeling lost. I too need to get pass this so i can enjoy the rest of my life, but its really easier said then done. I need to find a job and it is really hard to even apply myself.He was never convected because he fled, and just a year ago I saw him at a distance and it seem to set me back to that day May 21 2001. Cynthia do you know of any support group in the Bay Area I think I can benefit from one.

Last Edited by on Apr 23, 2009 1:21 PM
2 posts
Apr 24, 2009
10:41 AM
Thank you Cynthia for the resources. I would really like to try EMDR, but I'm not working and I don't think medical will pay for the service. I really do need to look into that because I'm tired of feeling tired and do need help. I think it's great that you have this site so people can log on to ask question. I have so many question that I don't where to begin. I'm just looking to start my life where I can be happy and not sad all the time.
210 posts
Apr 26, 2009
2:52 PM
Yeah, there is a huge amount of need for low-fee/no-fee EMDR treatment. You could try calling some of the resources above and asking if they know of any clinics you could go to that offer EMDR. You could also try the EMDRIA website where you can search for therapists, and maybe you can find something affordable. If you do find a resource, please let me know because as I said, many people ask me. If you don't find anything, I do hope you look again when you're working or have enough money to try it! In the mean time, you can still get counseling for low or no fees at various clinics, and that could help too.

Warm Regards,

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Email: CynthiaLubow@yahoo.com 

 Cynthia W. Lubow, MFT

 For 30 years, compassionately helping people build self-confidence and feel happier.

 San Francisco East Bay Area Therapist

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